Fight the Power: After COVID-19′s ‘pandemic pounds,’ I’m back in the gym

My morning felt like the beginning of an Eminem song: “His palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy.”

No, I wasn’t getting ready for a rap battle. Instead, I was doing something more stressful and that I hadn’t done in two years: getting back into the gym.

People usually use terms like “college fifteen” when a kid goes out on their own for the first year, but “pandemic pounds” is just as real.

When the world shut down two years ago, my caloric intake went up understandably. The world opted for the essentials of bread, cold cuts, and frozen pizzas. As a result, the impact of body issues occurred.

I was never a skinny kid, often having my mom shop for me in the husky sections of Sears (my big homies understand the plight) never felt comfortable in my skin. Going back into the gym, when people ask me my goals, I respond in a pretty modest way.

“I just wanna be comfortable enough to take my shirt off during a pickup basketball game.”

I wish I could be like Lizzo and walk on a plane with Prince-style butt pants, but I don’t have that confidence.

Designer Karl Lagerfeld once said, “Sweatpants are a sign of defeat. You lost control of your life, so you bought some sweatpants.” But body self-esteem is genuine without a pandemic forcing you to add inches to the midsection.

I giggle when I read that quote but when I look in my chest drawers, and that’s all I see, there’s some truth to it. I also wondered if I was the only person going through these feelings. My self-value is with my lack of abs, and I avoid mirrors. I begin to feel all failures in my life result from my weight.

Almost 40 and not married? It’s because you’re fat. Never got a major record deal? You’re a fatty McFatty. Have you had a bad day? Talk to my friend Cinnamon Toast Crunch.

I needed some advice from a pro, so I spoke with Angela Yong Sellers, 2022 Experience Columbia Ambassador and owner of Fit Columbia. I asked her how to love yourself even when you want to improve.

“I’m a mom of two and a woman in the fitness industry, I feel a critical eye on my body all the time. Generally, I move more than most people because of my life style so staying strong and healthy seems easy but it is a conscious effort,” Sellers said. “It would be irresponsible for me to not practice what I preach but if you have followed me over the years, I have gained & lost pounds just like anyone else. I’m human. The trick is to learn to love yourself, especially your curves and scars.”

Love yourself. What a concept and, at times, can be a difficult one.

A meme reads, “I wish I were as fat as I was when I first thought I was fat,” and I agree. I can find pictures of dreadlock Preach looking like a young James Earl Jones with not quite a 6-pack but probably thirty pounds lighter. Funny thing, I always felt as unattractive and big bone-did then too.

I began to see other friends not only go through the same things as I was feeling but making changes in their lives. A local billing consultant, Brittney Smith, shared her weight and workout journey on her Facebook page.

“My gym closed with the rise of the virus. I was isolated and anxious about being in public. It was depressing,” Smith said. “Weight came with the additional stressors and inactivity. I was extremely self conscious about the extra 50 pounds. My self esteem was shot and reflected in many areas of my life.”

Her social media is a video diary of the journey, dropping 35 pounds and counting. She offers advice on what the emotional toll can be.

“Self awareness is key,” Smith said. “Knowing my self worth despite how I felt about my body at that time, acknowledging that my worth was much more than looks or achievements.”

Preach Jacobs is a musician, artist and activist and founder of Cola-Con and indie label Sounds Familiar Records. You can hear his podcasts and read more work at FightThePower.co.

LINK: Thank you for interviewing me and writing this post-covid back in the gym article. Written by By Preach Jacobs

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